Okay, so i have to tell you about this room in my flat, when i First bought it. This bathroom was … well, calling it a bathroom is being generous. It was more like a cupboard with plumbing stuffed into it by someone who obviously hated humanity. Five feet by seven feet of pure misery. There was this avocado green suite that looked like it had been salvage from a hospital ward back in the seventies.
When i really looked at it — i mean properly — not just glancing at it during viewing while trying to convince myself the flat wasn’t too small, i actually stood in the doorway and said “oh god what have i done?” out loud. To myself. Which probably should’ve warned me about my mental state at the time anyway.
The toilet paper holder was literally hanging off the wall on only One screw. The shower curtain had this horrible floral pattern that must’ve been there since the previous owner moved in about fifteen years earlier. And the lighting … oh lord the lighting. That fluorescent strip makes everyone look like they’re dying of some disease from the Victorian era. I looked in the mirror under that thing and immediately knew why vampires avoid their reflections.
But here’s what i learned about how to deal with small bathrooms through months of looking at this space and trying to figure out what to do with it: if you get the basics right, small bathrooms are surprisingly forgiving. The problem is working out what those basics are when you’ve never renovated anything before and your only reference point is whatever your parents had when you were growing up.
That’s why i started documenting everything because as a software engineer that’s exactly what we do. Spreadsheets, photos, measurements, costs, timelines. My mate Dev thought i’d lost it when he saw my bathroom renovation project plan complete with a Gantt chart, but honestly it saved me from making several expensive mistakes.
My budget for the whole project was £2,800, which felt like loads of money at the time but turned out to be pretty reasonable for what i wanted to achieve. I’d done absolutely zero research into bathroom costs before i decided on that number – just figured it sounded sensible. Spoiler alert – bathroom stuff is expensive and all things take longer than you think they will.
One of the big decisions i had to make was whether or not to move the plumbing around. The toilet was in an awkward spot; the sink was tiny; and i kept thinking i could optimize the layout some way. Spent weeks drawing different configurations and taking measurements. Then i got quotes for moving pipes and nearly fell over. £1,200 just to shift the toilet eighteen inches to the left. That was nearly half of my budget gone before i’d even began.
So the layout remained exactly as it was. Which ended up being fine, actually. Sometimes the most practical decision (even when it isn’t very exciting) ends up being the right decision.
Paint choice took me approximately six weeks of agonizing. I’m not joking – paint samples were adorned on all walls like some kind of crazy art installation. Downstairs neighbor likely thinks i’ve gone completely mad now though. But i wanted to get it right because paint affects everything else inside the room.
In the end went with pale blue-grey called Borrowed Light from Farrow & Ball. £89 for two tins was ridiculous for paint, but once i applied the First coat – instantly knew it was worth it. Suddenly the room seemed twice its size, ten times calmer and my mum came round saying “oh nice, that looks like a real bathroom now” – which is basically the highest praise she can give me.
Lighting was next thing on my list, and probaby made the biggest difference in terms of using the space properly. That fluorescent strip needed to go – couldn’t stand another morning of looking like an extra from a zombie film any more. Replaced it with three new lights instead: pendant over sink area, some ceiling-mounted led spots, and backlit mirror that cost a lot more than planned but transformed the entire room.
Mirror cost £320 (which felt insane), gives off soft glow that makes everything look better — including at 6am when i’m half awake and definitely not looking my best either. Also doesn’t cast these ugly shadows that normal bathroom lighting does.
Floor tiles weren’t much fun either – had to bring home every sample tile from every shop within ten miles (mate Dev thinks i’m losing it watching him see my bathroom renovation project plan complete with Gantt chart). Ended up going with huge grey floor tiles – 60cm squares, which sounds bonkers in such a tiny space but works perfectly in practice. Fewer grout lines means cleaner-looking surface, also appears larger. Cost £180 for tiles + £300 for professional installation because no way i would attempt doing that ourselves.
Walls – did half-tiles / half-paint. White metro tiles on lower part of walls (up to shoulder height); pale blue-grey paint above that. Metros were on clearance (£2.50/sq meter instead of standard price of £8 due to line being discontinued). Sometimes indecisiveness pays off because if i’d purchased them when First seen would’ve paid triple price.
Vanity almost killed me – everything was massive, wouldn’t fit; tiny, utterly useless; or looked like something belonging in a premier Inn hotel. Eventually found wall hung vanity that’s only 400mm deep yet has storage too; £280 and totally worth it because gets all floor space below, so feels less cramped.
Did make some genuine mistakes though. Purchased curved shower curtain rail thinking it would create more space inside bath. Technically created more space inside bath but stuck out far enough that i walked into it every single time i went near sink. Lived with it for three weeks thinking i’d get used to it; swapped it for straight One after giving up on it altogether; sometimes obvious choices are obvious for good reasons.
Toilet roll holder placement was total mess – placed where it looked rightest aesthetically; which turned out terribly wrong practically; had to move it twice; left three sets of holes in walls which had to be filled/repainted over; apparently my perfectionism doesnt extend beyond software development/DIY projects either.
Storage became obsession — added floating shelves above toilet; corner shelf unit in shower; hooks on rear door; more hooks on walls — every single inch matters when dealing with such a little space — got a bit carried away with it — girlfriend said it looked like i’d prepared for siege which wasn’t entirely untrue either.
Heated towel bars were last minute addition but turned out brilliant — no room for radiator; mounted these behind door — £85 each; diffrence on cold mornings is gigantic; plus don’t take up any floor space — win-win situation both ways.
